Hong Kong: Day 5, Honoring the family

We started the day off in a panic by oversleeping. My mom was so sure she’d wake up early that she did not set the alarm clock. We must have been really tired since I was the first to awaken at 7:45 (45 minutes late)! Luckily, we were able to make up the time by eating breakfast in our room as we got ready (fruit, tea, and the emergency crisp bread I’d brought in case I really didn’t like a meal.) An hour later, my cousin picked us up and drove us to the family plot.

The graveyard was on the side of a mountain on the far side of Hong Kong island. Graves with a view are highly coveted, and this was one of the best locations with a magnificent ocean view. The family plots were about halfway up the mountain, which meant a lot of stairs. It was no problem for me, but it couldn’t have been easy for Uncle L or Aunt R (Aunt A did not come—it would have been impossible for her anyhow).

We started by sweeping the graves and arranging the flowers—various relatives getting different yet very specific combinations of flowers. On the top level, there was only the grave of my mom’s parents. Her father was buried where he died in China during WWII, but Uncle L made a tremendous effort and retrieved his bones and had him reburied with his wife in the 1980’s. At this grave, we lined up and bowed three times, then three more times on the behalf of all the relatives who were not there. Then we moved down a level to the grave of mom’s grandfather and uncles, and we repeated the bowing thing. Then we moved down yet another level to the graves of mom’s grandmother, grandfather’s first wife (the oldest grave in the bunch), and a few other relatives. Again, we repeated the bowing thing. It’s interesting that the graves are arranged that the highest grave has the highest place of honor, but the lower two levels are now full. Hopefully the ancestor’s ghosts are practical and will understand that whoever dies next and gets the remaining spots on the top level are not claiming the places out of disrespect or anything like that.

After the graveyard, my cousin had to get to work, so he dropped mom, Uncle L, and I off downtown. Mom had an appointment to take care of some visa related stuff, so that took a couple hours, then Uncle took us out to lunch at a wonderful buffet which served both western and Chinese dishes and a lovely selection of desserts. After lunch, he wanted to take us on the double-deck tram to the end of the line and back in both directions to see the city. He said this would take about 45 minutes, so off we went. He pointed out the history and a lot of interesting facts. At the end of the line, we spent a few minutes walking around an open air market that sold mostly food (very interesting, but not particularly appetizing to somebody who is used to seeing meat handled under sanitary conditions and wrapped in plastic. By the time we got back to our starting point in the middle 2 ½ hours later, we convinced him to skip the other direction. Then he wanted to show us his office. After that we had to hurry back to the hotel so that we could meet Aunt R for dinner.

Dinner was at an Austrian restaurant together with Uncle A from Las Vegas who just happened to be in town for the day. Again, it was another excellent meal. After dinner, mom took me to a shop where she had found a particularly good deal because she wanted me to get some black slacks. I found some for about $15, and I got a suit for $50 too.

Hong Kong: Day 4, a lesson in humidity

This morning we went to breakfast at a restaurant recommended by my cousin E who visited recently from the states. I ordered scrambled eggs, sausage, toast, and tea. The place certainly was a bargain with the full meal for about $3, but it was not so good. Sausage turned out to be hot dogs, and I think the eggs were powdered and undercooked. Oh well, we’ll try someplace else tomorrow.

My mom went back to the hotel to meet her sister for church, so I went for a walk in Kowloon Park. Despite the heat (~25 C/77 F) and extreme humidity, there were a lot of people of all ages there exercising in one way or another: jogging with i-pods, doing tai-chi or yoga alone, or doing tai-chi-like martial arts (with or without swords) in large groups. The park had an exercise trail with built in equipment and instructions.

After church, we took the ferry over to Hong Kong Island where my cousin V and his wife picked us up. We drove to “the peak” which is a mall at the top of the mountain. There is also a tram that goes up there, and it has long been a tourist destination because of the spectacular views. Unfortunately the humidity was manifesting itself as a dense fog up there, so we could hardly see from one building to another. If we get a clear day later on, maybe we’ll go back, but this mountain really feels like a rain forest to me. Stepping out of the air conditioned car felt like walking into the bathroom right after somebody had taken a hot shower. It was almost hard to breathe. I found myself checking my glasses and camera all the time because I thought they’d fogged up, but they hadn’t; it was really just the humidity. My cousin said it is often so damp in the high-rise apartments that seem to have sprouted out of the sides of the mountain that people regularly have to wipe off their furniture with a towel and ring it out into a bucket (indoors!).

My mom treated us to lunch at the restaurant that had been recommended in her guidebook. The menu was a curious blend of Indian, Thai, Mexican, and western. Unfortunately, we were ordering family style where we share the dishes, so Mexican was out. I’m not so fond of Indian food, and the pad thai that I ordered wasn’t very good, but I did not leave hungry.

I asked if there was anything like an “old town” or historic neighborhood in Hong Kong, so they tried to show me some older buildings that dated to before WWII, but they were few and far between. The property values have been very high for quite some time; therefore much of the old has long since been torn down. We were luck enough to stumble across a street performance with Lion Dancers which was fascinating. Unfortunately there was no place around to park legally, so I only got to watch for a few minutes. We also got to see a Buddhist temple, an herbalist shop, and a selection of other places, all while my cousin double parked. I was so impressed with his driving skills, both for being able to find his way around this maze of one-way streets and dead-ends (few of which are straight due to the hilly landscape), and for doing all this without getting hit by a bus, trolley, or taxi which zoom around like crazy.

We dropped his wife off because she was invited out by friends, then we continued the tour around to the other side of the island where the old fishing villages had been converted into beachside resorts/luxury living. Here the sun was almost reaching through the humidity creating some very nice light. We were lucky enough to find a parking place, so we all got out and walked around for a while. Then we made a quick visit to my cousin’s beautiful apartment before heading off to the yacht club for a delicious buffet dinner. We ate outside where we should have had a fantastic view of the Hong Kong waterfront and Kowloon, but it was so foggy that we could barely see Kowloon, and once again the light show was pretty much lost on us. The lights reflecting off the fog made for an eerie brightness.

Hong Kong: Day 3, Full Stomach, Tired Feet

(View from hotel room in the morning.) I had no problem with jetlag whatsoever and slept like a log from 10:30 PM to 7 AM. Still full from yesterday, a cup of tea in the hotel room was sufficient for breakfast. We took the bus to Uncle L and Aunt A’s place. On mom’s request, I took some portraits of them. Then it was off for dim sum at Maxim’s Palace—THE place for dim sum.

The restaurant is donut shaped to facilitate the counter-clockwise flow if the dim sum carts. The restaurant can seat 3000 people, yet there was a line already when we got there at 10:30. They don’t take reservations, but they recognized Uncle L and lead us directly to a table that was still being cleared. I noticed that at about ¼ of the tables, there sat only one or two people drinking tea and reading newspapers. I guess it’s a tradition that somebody has to get there early and claim a table. As always, Aunty A’s servant was there, but it really surprised me when the first thing she did was to gather up all the dishes and utensils and rinse them one by one with tea in a small bowl. Apparently this tradition developed because people are uncertain how clean these items are and like to reassure themselves. Now I must point out that this is a very fancy restaurant, and it’s unlikely that the dishes sit around getting dusty. It seemed very odd that they would provide the tea and washing bowl so that customers can splash tea all over their white tablecloths. Even odder, there were no napkins provided at this restaurant even though dim sum includes several items that are usually eaten as finger food. All the places we ate yesterday provided prepackaged moist towelettes along with the napkins so that one could wash their hands before eating (something I really appreciated in the absence of my Purell), but this restaurant did not.

Aunt R was to meet us there, but I can’t imagine how she could have found us if the servant hadn’t gone to the entrance to wait for her. As anyone who’s ever been to a dim sum restaurant can probably imagine, the noise level here was nearly deafening. It didn’t really matter to me though since the conversation and the explanation of the various dishes was in Cantonese, and they didn’t pick up the baskets to show off the contents, so I had pretty much no idea what was being ordered. I would have liked to try some new things, though not necessarily the things that were ordered (like sea cucumber, black eggs, and chicken feet). I filled up on barbecue pork buns, red bean buns, a few other dumplings, and noodles with mushrooms.

After lunch, I went with mom and Aunt R to the flower market to buy flowers to take to the family grave sites on Monday. I questioned buying flowers on Valentines day, but I was told that they needed so much prep in order to be suitable for the graves that her servant would need the time. On the way to the flower market, we walked through a regular market with a wide variety of stalls selling everything from underwear to fruit. My attempts at bargaining were met with “we don’t bargain here,” yet my mom and Aunt didn’t pay full price for anything.

The flower market was overwhelming. The variety of flowers was impressive to say the least, but even more impressive were the hundreds of mostly young men buying Valentines bouquets. Roses were the most common, in every imaginable color (though I doubt the blue ones exist in nature), but the orchids and unusual flowers were the most interesting to me. I’d never seen long-stemmed decorative cabbages before. (If roses say "I love you," what do cabbages say?)

Mom and Aunt R bought so many flowers that R’s servant had to come to carry the flowers home for her.

After the flower market, we went to the Bird garden. I was expecting an aviary, but instead it was more of a marketplace where people sold caged birds and their accessories. It was also a place for bird people to socialize, and they bring their caged birds to interact with their friend’s caged birds. Even the restaurants in the area have hooks for people to hang their birdcages. While I felt sorry for the birds, I was glad they’d taken me here because I never would have gone their otherwise.

Then it was back to Aunt R’s apartment for a while. The school my mom went to was right next door, and she wanted me to take her picture there. There was some sort of festival going on, so we walked right in. A minute later we were chased down because we didn’t pay admission, but after some negotiation, my mom got her picture and we left. I teased my mom about being in trouble with the nuns again, but she said it was okay since the security people weren’t nuns.

Like Uncle L’s apartment, the centerpiece of Aunt R’s apartment was a gigantic built-in knick-knack shelf stuffed full. Once again, we were asked to each choose something from their knick-knack shelves to bring home with us. I thought that was pretty weird, but my mom thought it was normal. For me, it was a test in Chineseness. If I picked something too valuable, that would be greedy. If I picked something too cheap, I might insult them. If I picked something with sentimental value, I might put them in an awkward position. Balance that with the thought that I’d have to get it home, so it shouldn’t be too fragile, large, or heavy, and then I’d have to store it in my own knick-knack shelf until faced with my own mortality I felt compelled to pass it on to the next generation.

In the evening, we took the bus back to the hotel for a nap/a little blog time. It wasn’t until around 7 that I started to get hungry enough to think that I actually wanted dinner. Being Valentines night I figured all the restaurants would be packed, but the guidebook mentioned a deli in the area, so we went there. It turns out it was a pretty fancy restaurant with American food, but we arrived during the nightly 8 PM light show that they do at the waterfront, so we were able to get a table. After dinner we walked along the waterfront which was lovely but very crowded. I’ll probably go back some other day to catch the light show.

Hong Kong: Day 2, no rest for the weary

Despite having been on the road since very early the previous morning, we hit the ground running (or at least walking) as soon as we arrived. Our hotel room wasn’t ready for us, so we had breakfast at the hotel cafeteria with my mom’s brother and sister (Uncle L and Aunt R). I had stir-fried noodles with dim sum. Then as we were leaving to go for a walk, we found out that our room was ready. It was really nice to be able to change clothes since it was about 75 F/ 2X C and phenomenally humid. So maybe an hour and a half after breakfast, we went out for lunch at a Shanghai style restaurant where we tried their variant of dim sum. The wonton soup was great, but the potstickers weren’t as good as I’d hoped for. There were also some soupy buns—be careful eating these because they tend to either squirt or dribble broth down your chin.

Then Uncle left us and Aunt went window shopping with us. We started by going to my mom’s favorite optician to order glasses. I ordered a pair of prescription sunglasses for under $200. I should mention that compared to these two, my mom moves like lightning. It was really difficult for me to walk so slowly and hundreds of people pushed their way by us. Eventually I got their blessing to meet them back at the hotel in a few hours and headed off on my own.

I was amazed at the variety in this part of town. One block would be just packed with signs for a thousand shops, then the next would be lined with fabulous old banyan trees. There were fancy malls with high end designer wares, and other shops that were probably really alleys. And if you looked up, you’d see how a lot of people live in rather run down high-rise buildings. Condensation from the hundreds of old air conditioners rained down on the sidewalks, and every store had their doors wide open and air conditioners on full blast so the further into a shop you walked, the cooler it got (quite an enticement on a day like this). Clearly electricity is too cheap here. Each store also had an abundance of clerks and an additional person who stood on the sidewalk and tried to talk people into visiting the store with coupons or promises of huge discounts. The sidewalks were also lined with men (most appeared to be of Indian descent) muttering or calling out, or even chasing you down the sidewalk if you accidentally made eye contact with offers of custom tailored, suits, imitation Rolexes, or copies of designer purses. I was warned that these guys are associated with shops either above or below street level, and that they would want me to follow them away from the crowds, but I wasn’t up for that.

I was surprised to discover that many of the discount stores do not allow you to try on the clothes. Considering how much bigger than average I am around here, I wouldn’t even consider buying anything without trying it on. It seemed like about every third shop was either a restaurant of some kind or a jewelry store. Camera and electronics stores were also very common. None of these seemed particularly busy, but there somehow must be enough business to go around.

By 4 PM I ended up back at the hotel for a well deserved shower. At 6 PM, Aunt R picked us up to go out to dinner with Uncle L at his wife’s favorite Cantonese restaurant. Uncle L’s wife (Aunt A) has always been quite a character. While she used to hold an import and respected job, she is now retired to life as a princess. She is far to dainty and delicate for any sort of vigorous or strenuous activity. The more she complains, the more Uncle L pampers her, so she is now pretty much completely helpless. She has a full time servant who pushes her around in a wheelchair, serves her food, and keeps her napkin tucked in. She refuses to take medicine or supplements since the pills are too big for her to swallow, thus she suffers from osteoporosis. A month ago she fell and broke her wrist. This was such a horrible and painful experience for her that she could not eat or drink and consequently needed to be hospitalized for over a week. The hospital staff could not cater to her adequately, so her servant had to sleep there with her.

Dinner started out with FRESH shrimp in my honor. Now I don’t particularly like shrimp, and I prefer not to eat things that filter for a living, so there was no way I’d be able to eat giant shrimp that had only moments before been boiled alive and were served intact with eyes and feet and all. I could swear that the antennae were still twitching. I fear I may have angered Uncle L since Aunt A ordered it specifically for me. Sorry, but I have my limits. The second course was soup which was pretty good (I avoided the mystery meat at the bottom). Then came duck skin. Then roast chicken, artfully cut up and presented artfully as though it was flying (complete with the head). Then something that could have been sautéed romaine lettuce with nuts. Then the rest of the duck chopped finely and served in lettuce cups. Then fried rice with pork fat. Luckily I was not the least bit hungry after the two previous meals.

Another thing about dinner was that the restaurant was so loud. It appeared to have normal sound dampening like carpet and such, but it was full on a Friday night, and Cantonese is a loud language. It is not spoken, it is yelled. I had a hard time following the conversations, and besides ringing, my ears actually hurt. Luckily our hotel room is on the 8th floor so the traffic noise isn't so bad. And the view is amazing!

Now I’m thoroughly exhausted, and the internet connection (that we had to pay extra for) is so slow that I can’t even load a weather forecast. I’ll try to upload some pictures, but since it’s now 10 PM, I won’t spend long trying tonight. We have to get up early tomorrow so that we can meet Uncle L and Aunt A for brunch.

Hong Kong: Day 1, the journey

The day started early, 3 AM, in Sweden where we were going into day 3 of a snowstorm. Luckily it was wet snow that melted a bit during the day, so we were able to get out through about 8 inches of snow blown over the road. My husband and daughter dropped me off at the train station, and I had about 20 minutes to appreciate the windy cold that I was leaving. I'd done online check-in the night before so I didn't have to do battle with the check in machines, but I still had to stand in the same long line to drop off my luggage. Regardless it went smoothly. The only hassle I had was at security where they confiscated my precious hand sanitizer. This really irritated me because it's something I really like to have for airplane lavatories (not to mention the prospect of public restrooms in China), and I've had no trouble traveling with it many times in the past. Anyway, TSA guys are the same all over the world, and when they're on a power trip, there's no point in arguing or begging. This guy's line was that it was a fire hazard.

The British Airways flight to London was uneventful, as was changing terminals and finding my next flight. There was this lady that had been on the same flights with two boys about 2-3 years old. I felt so sorry for her as these kids ran totally wild. I briefly considered offering to help, but it seemed that she wasn't all that interested in keeping them under control, so I quickly got over that thought. Flying alone is downright relaxing.

On the longer flight, I watched the movie Duchess which I enjoyed. It was a chick film, which is kind of a shame because I would have liked it even more if they'd focused more on her political involvement and influence on society (which was pretty much unthinkable for a women in her day). I also did a few sudoku puzzles and read my book, Amy Tan's The Opposite of Fate.

We arrived in Hong Kong at 7 AM. I'd heard so much about the planes flying in low over Hong Kong then dropping like a rock to land before skidding into the bay (kind of like San Diego, but even more so), that I was a bit disappointed to glide in smoothly over the bay. Apparently they built a new airport. My mom's flight arrived just a half hour after mine, so I met her at the baggage claim, and we took a taxi to our hotel. We'd been planning on taking the bus, but Uncle was anxious to meet us for breakfast and insisted on the taxi. Traffic was pretty bad, and they drive on the "wrong" side of the street very aggressively, so it was both an exciting and scenic ride.

Meet the Neighbors

The farm closest to us has changed owners three times since we've lived here, and it looks like it will soon change again. The one thing these three owners have had in common was that they kept pretty much to themselves, and the current owners really take that to an extreme. They seem nice enough when we do happen to run into them, but that's not often. About a year ago we saw an ad that there farm was on the market. Then in January, we found out from other neighbors* that a family was renting in the area who were in the process of moving here from France. They wanted to buy the neighboring farm as soon as their place in France sold.

Yesterday my daughter and I decided to pay a visit to these new neighbors. We just showed up on their doorstep with a Swedish pastry and introduced ourselves. Since there really is no good time to just drop in unannounced on people you don't know, it turned out that they were just about to sit down to a late lunch. They invited us in anyhow, and the kids started playing immediately. They have two daughters, ages 4 and 7, so my 6 year old fit right in. The girls have only been here a few weeks and spoke French, but that didn't stop them. The mom is Swedish but had been living in France for the past 15 years. The dad is French and doesn't speak much Swedish yet, but they had no problem speaking English.

I really hope that everything works out so that they will soon be our new neighbors. It would be so great for my daughter to have somebody to play with within walking distance, and I'd be thrilled to have more friends around here too.

*I believe that's the way to find out anything around here--ask the neighbors, not the people in question. I don't know if asking directly would be considered rude. It really is funny how often we're asked about what other people around here are up to, and I've heard from our friends that they often get similar questions about us.

Countdown

A week from today I'll be on my way to Hong Kong. My mom has invited me to join her on this trip to celebrate my 40th birthday. I'll be gone for a total of 16 days, 5 of which will be in China. While I've been to Hong Kong and Taiwan as a child, this will be my first trip to China. Plus, I'm sure Hong Kong has changed a lot in the last 30+ years, not the least of which is that it is once again part of China and not a British territory. Of course, I'll be taking my camera and my computer, so hopefully I'll be able to keep my blog updated (as if I were so good at that anyhow, but one can dream). What I will not be taking with me is my husband and my daughter. They were not invited. Well, it's not like my husband would want to take that much time off from work to hang out with my extended family anyhow, and my mom thought my daughter would be too much to handle at this age.

I'm really looking forward to this trip. I had a great time exploring Montreal last September, but that's tame compared to Hong Kong and China. I'm expecting to really stretch my comfort zone and experience something different. It will be nice to reconnect with that side of my family again, but I'm also looking forward to spending some time by myself (as any mother of a 6 year old would understand). I'm even looking forward to the flight as an opportunity to get some reading done.

Another interesting aspect of this trip is that my husband will be taking care of our daughter by himself while I'm gone. This will be the first time he's done this for more than a day. I imagine he'll gain a whole new appreciation for parenting (and all the fun stuff that goes with it like laundry, cooking, doing dishes, keeping a fire going so that the house doesn't get too cold, etc.) I wish him luck (otherwise I'll have a whole lot to do when I get home).