An era has come to an end

(We interrupt my vacation summary for this breaking news....)

It's finally over. Our house in San Diego is finally sold. I'm relieved that this hellish process of selling the house, which has dragged on since August, is finally over. But I'm sad too. I feel bridges have been burned. The option of someday moving back to San Diego is more remote. It's not like we were planning on moving back, but when we left for the second time in 2006, we wanted to keep that option open.

Here's the recap: In 1998, we sold our house in the Clairemont area of San Diego and moved to Sweden. My husband had been working for a defense sub-contractor in SD and continued to do so remotely. He'd been with this company since they were only seven people, so it was kind of like family. In early 2003, his boss (the president of the company) was killed by terrorists in Kuwait. Several extended trips to SD followed, and my husband was encouraged to move back to fill the gap. A lot of effort went into finding the right house in SD, but when we found this one in the Poway area, we were sure it was the one we wanted. It was already in escrow, but they buyer was having problems coming up with the money, so we made a back-up offer at the asking price. The seller made an ultimatum that the first buyer couldn't meet, and the house was ours.

I loved that house--the floor plan with a guest suite downstairs, the convenient location, the view to both east and west, the nice neighborhood, the friendly neighbors, the good school district. It was a bargain because it had been a rental for years, but everything it needed, we could do ourselves. (That we never got around to doing a lot of these things is another story.)

We moved in fall 2003, and lived there until fall 2006 when we moved back to Sweden. During these years, we spent the summers (May through August) in Sweden. It was the best of both worlds in many ways. Unfortunately things didn't develop with my husband's career the way we'd expected. He worked incredibly long hours under stressful conditions until he burned out. It was then we decided to move back to Sweden full time. He didn't have a job in Sweden yet, and we weren't sure if he'd ever be able to find something as well-paying as he could in SD, so we decided to rent out the house instead of selling it. In retrospect, this was our second mistake.

Our first mistake was refinancing the house in the way that we did. The original purchase price of just under a half million dollars was a good price for the house, but we didn't qualify for a traditional loan (consultants based outside the US). This wasn't a problem because we had a mortgage broker who came highly recommended by several friends. This guy specialized in creative financing. We took two loans which we new were bad long term, with the plan of refinancing after a year or two. And so we did, and everything worked out fine. Our house had increased in value 20% the first year, so when we refinanced, we took out some funds to upgrade (exterior paint, insulated windows, new heater and air-conditioner). Unfortunately, we were talked into another bad loan--not quite as bad as the first, but we knew it would get ugly if we didn't refinance within a few years. Nobody expected the housing market to take a downturn. At worse, prices might level off. Seriously, who wouldn't want to live in San Diego?

Then the market did make that downturn, and it went from not being a good time to refinance, to being impossible to refinance. Our mortgage broker stopped returning calls and eventually disappeared entirely. In 2008, we tried to renegotiate our loan, but the bank was not interested. By the beginning of 2009, our income from rent covered only half of the mortgage payment. We wanted to sell, but for us to break even, the house would have to be priced considerably above market value. The tenants were uncooperative. The bank was uncooperative. The property manager was uncommunicative (turns out his wife had just miscarried their twins and was having serious medical problems, so I'll cut him some slack).

In May, I stopped making mortgage payments. In July, someone at the bank decided to return one of my calls, and I was sent paperwork to apply for a short sale. [In a short sale, the house is sold and the bank accepts that as payment in full, forgiving the rest of the debt. This generally gets the bank a lot more money than if the house was sold at auction, and it saves them the trouble of the foreclosure.] It took weeks for me to fill out all that paperwork, but I sent it back in August, along with several questions. We put the house on the market at market value. Because of our uncooperative tenants, we had no choice other than to use the property manager as the selling agent. He's a nice guy and all, but unfortunately not the best person for the job. In September, we got a form letter from the bank saying they'd put our application on hold because it was incomplete. They did not answer any of our questions or even say what they were missing. I finally found someone at the bank whom I could call, but it turned out she was clueless. I'd send in more and more papers, trying to guess what it was they wanted. We got offers on the house, and the property manager sent them to the bank, but the bank did not respond. Eventually the offers were withdrawn, and new offers were submitted, but still no response.

Finally, in the beginning of December, the property manager got a hold of somebody at the bank who wanted to make this work, and they accepted an offer. This person told me what information they were missing, and I was able to e-mail it to her within minutes. The bank wanted a quick escrow, and that was fine with me. We would have less of a tax penalty if we could get the deal done in 2009. And then, nothing for a couple weeks. I'd fooled myself into believing that people were doing their jobs and everything was moving along as it should.

Suddenly we were up against the foreclosure deadline,December 21, and the house was about to be auctioned off. The buyer had to fork over $10,000 to stop it, and they did. No worries, they said, this should all be done before Christmas. Except the escrow officer went on vacation, and nobody seemed to have anticipated this. Everything just stopped. Over Christmas, the bank got bought by another bank which now could force us to start over with everything if the deal in progress was not fulfilled. New deadline for the house being auctioned off, January 19th. On January 14th, we were told we needed to wire transfer $4000 immediately and get a bunch of papers notarized and sent back.

The money shouldn't have been a problem since I had enough in my bank in SD. But then it turned out that Wells Fargo was incapable of electronically transferring money to another bank within the US. They have an online-bill-pay thing, but with that, they generate a paper check and mail it. It also doesn't work if your bank account don't have a US address. Luckily my mom was able to come to the rescue and wire the money from her bank, and I would pay her back. Now notarization is something that is no longer done in Sweden, and for a US notary, I'd have to go to the embassy. That's expensive and a major pain, but luckily we were leaving for Miami on the 16th and took the papers with us. It turned out that finding a notary and FedEx on a Sunday in Miami was not all that difficult (see vacation day two for the story).

So now I actually got my hopes up and believed we would soon close escrow. What I didn't know was that the buyer's agent was a total idiot. He was supposed to have an appraisal done in the beginning of December. Somehow he'd forgotten to look at it or send it along. Now it turns out that the appraisal came in $15,000 under the offer. This means the buyer's loan would be $15,000 short, but he didn't understand that. There was not time to redo the appraisal, and the buyers couldn't scrape together another $15,000 in cash. My bank was not about to budge. After all this work, the only solution was for the agents to reduce their commissions or the whole deal would fall through. Apparently this took some time to negotiate. The January 19th deadline got extended to the 29th, and I expected to come home from Florida to news that escrow had closed. Silly me.

Somewhere along the line, someone had forgotten to mention that the buyer expected to be reimbursed for the $10,000 that they'd put up to stop the first auction. This didn't really surprise me. There had been reference to a $10,000 seller's contribution in the paperwork since mid-December, so I was kine of prepared for this. I thought I'd gotten lucky with having to pay only $4000. I'd assumed that we'd end up splitting the sum, but since nobody mentioned it, I'd hoped they were okay with it. So now it came down to me wiring $10,000 immediately or the whole thing would fall through. This was too much for me to ask my mom or anyone else for, and I new I wouldn't be able to get it out of Wells Fargo account. I had to skip an online meeting in order to drive to the bank in a snowstorm, but I was able to wire the money from Sweden. The original (clueless) contact person from the bank is involved again and threatening not to extend anymore. She'd rather let the whole thing fall apart than give people the time they need. I guess the only incompetence she tolerates is her own. Fortunately the other bank person outranks her, and cooler heads prevail. Then the buyer had to deliver a cashier's check, but it wasn't enough. So the buyer had to wire money, but they missed the deadline at their bank, so it took an extra day. Then there was some delay in their lender funding. I can no longer imagine what. I believe everything that could possibly be screwed up has already been screwed up at least twice. Does anybody know what they're doing?

Finally, last night, they told me that the sale had been recorded. It's over. I'm relieved, but yet it's not all good. My bridges are burned. This transaction has ruined my good credit rating, and not living in the US, it will be difficult to improve it. Without good credit, moving back to the US would be much harder.

Florida, day 9-10: Big Cypress

We wanted to get to the Big Cypress RV campground where we would be spending the night before they closed at 4, and we weren't certain how far away it was, so we didn't do any more sightseeing in Everglades National Park. There are very few places to stay near the Everglades, so I was excited to have found a cabin to rent on the Seminole Indian Reservation where our following day's activities were planned. Unfortunately we didn't know exactly where this place was, only which highway exit, and "follow the signs." Where we were in the Everglades was about 30 miles from this exit, as the crow flies, but it turned out to be about 80 miles to drive there. When doing my research, I'd mistaken a county line for a road. Oops.

We drove east through Big Cypress National Preserve, and this was spectacular. I really enjoyed the cypress mangroves with the bromeliads and Spanish moss hanging from the branches, and I wish we'd taken the time to stop at the Big Cypress visitor center.

Our daughter started counting alligators along the road as we drove, but there were so many she soon lost count. I'd estimate that we saw over a hundred.

The drive got less interesting when we turned north, and even less interesting when we turned east onto Alligator Alley. It was drier here, with the water only in one big man-made canal. There were no alligators to be seen, just flat, straight highway. We exited the highway at the designated intersection and drove through the Seminole Indian Reservation. Here it looked neither like the Everglades now like the Big Cypress preserve. It reminded me of the Argentine pampas, a flat grassland dotted with rather thin cattle. We found the campground about 30 miles from the turnoff (certainly further than I'd anticipated), and we it was after 4 by the time we got there. Luckily they left instructions, so that wasn't a problem.

The cabin was tiny, with two small bunks, a closet, a small sofa, a table with two chairs, a bathroom, and a small kitchen. Above the kitchen and bathroom was a small loft with three mattresses. My husband and I decided to sleep up there since the bunks weren't full length. The cabin was small compared to the ones we'd used in Norway, but it was clean and it met our needs.

Our neighbors seemed to be living much more luxuriously in their motorhomes. These things were enormous! Many people had supplemented their living space by setting up patios, gardens in pots, Christmas lights, or screened in tents. There were also plenty of expensive "toys" (like motorcycles or sports cars) around. Some of the RVs even had drive in garages. All were pulled by huge trucks that made my husband drool.

We went out to forage for food and found provisions for dinner and breakfast at the gas station. When we returned, most of our neighbors, who'd been out and about earlier, were nowhere to be seen. We did eventually find someone from whom we borrowed a lighter to light the gas stove. I made spaghetti, and we prepared to eat outside. Then we discovered the mosquitoes--that's why nobody was outside. This was the only time we were bothered by bugs, and it wasn't really a problem at all.

The next morning, we got off to a leisurely start. My daughter and I explored the RV park and played a round of mini-golf. We walked into the clubhouse where a few ladies were preparing for a birthday party. They were very friendly and invited us to the party, but we would be out for the day by then. Another group of ladies were doing water aerobics in the pool. These were active seniors enjoying their retirement, and I was impressed by the sense of community. I think I might enjoy retiring to a motor home and traveling around the US, following the good weather.

Florida, day 9: Everglades

We said a reluctant goodbye to our fantastic suite at the Hilton and drove out to the Everglades. We took route 41, the Tamiami Highway. This was not "Alligator Alley" but we kept our eyes open anyhow, and soon after we left civilization, we started seeing them along the canal.

I've always been uncomfortable about alligators, crocodiles, and other large dinosaur-like carnivorous reptiles. One could say I have an irrational fear of dinosaurs. Normally this isn't much of a problem, except that movies like Jurasic Park give me nightmares. So I was a bit apprehensive about seeing alligators up close and personal. I kind of figured we'd see big alligators kind of like we saw bears in Kings Canyon. When there was a bear, there was usually a traffic jam and a mob of people photographing it from the side of the road. I think we saw 10 bears in 5 days, and we thought that was a lot.

We drove past several alligator farm type places offering alligator shows and airboat rides, and went directly to Everglades National Park. Shortly after we turned into the Shark Valley entrance, traffic came to a standstill. They were only letting cars in as other cars left. We waited for about 20 minutes, and during that time, we watched the birds and alligators in the small canal beside the road. There were plenty of long lenses pointed out car windows.

When we got in, we didn't have long to wait before our two-hour tram tour. I'd been under the impression that there would be at least a snack bar by the visitor's center, but there wasn't. Luckily we'd taken with us some snacks and plenty to drink. The tram tour was operated by a concession. We got seats in the first row to better hear the narration. Our guide was entertaining and informative, but clearly not a biologist.

He talked about the different habitats and seasonal variation, how fast the "river" flows, how the road was built, a bunch of different birds, and of course, alligators. He had a very interesting analogy. In the winter, water is scarce. The large alligators thrash around in the mud making pits where the water is deeper. These alligator pits become home not only to alligators of all sized but fish, turtles, and birds as well like a concentrated ecosystem. Because of the low temperature, the alligators only need to eat about once a month. So about once per month, he eats one of his neighbors, and the rent is paid. Everyone lives peacefully until next month when the rent comes due again.

Much to our surprise, our guide waded into the swamp to show us the blue-green algae. He wasn't worried about alligators, but the snakes could be a real problem.

At the end of the road was an old observation tower where they used to watch for fires. Since the park service realized that fires were a natural part of the ecosystem, they stopped doing this, but the tourists had a destination where they could walk up for a better view of an otherwise phenomenally flat landscape. I was amazed by the number of huge (>4 m/12 ft) alligators that we could see from here. Unlike crocodiles, alligators don't usually eat anything larger than their heads because their teeth don't fit together for cutting. Alligators are also mellow in contrast to their aggressive cousins, crocodiles. There was a 6 foot alligator right next to the trail, and people were walking right by it, but it didn't blink an eye.

Back at the visitor center, a ranger gave a talk about vultures, a very important part of the ecosystem. They were all very well fed because the cold weather a couple weeks before had killed a lot of fish. In some areas, there were still dead fish floating around.

(N)everlost

Our Hertz rental car in Florida came with a GPS called Neverlost. After a couple of days, I wished for a black sharpie pen to get rid of the N. Everlost was a much better name for it. We came to think of it as the on-board entertainment system.

I drove to my step-sister's house nearly every day, and while I had the GPS on, I'm glad I googled driving instructions and wrote them down. As far as we could tell, Everlost thought she lives in the Everglades. Even when I was just a few blocks from her house, it would beg me to turn the opposite direction, yet when I was a few houses away, it smuggly announced "you have arrived at your destination" as if it could claim any credit for that accomplishment. Usually the directions it gave were the same, but one day it suddenly instructed me to get off the highway even though I was only half way there, and take surface streets. (No, it doesn't receive input on traffic, and there wasn't any.)

We asked it to find Harbor Freight Tools, and it tried to send us to Ohio. For something else, it suggested Alabama. It would frequently instruct us to make a U-turn a block from our destination, so we always needed a map and the street address to find our way. We were baffled that Hertz actually charges extra for this "service."

7 Tulips

The other day when grocery shopping, I bought myself a bunch of lovely purple tulips. I rarely indulge in fresh flowers, but tulips are my favorite, and they were on sale. I put them in a nice glass pitcher on the kitchen table and felt quite pleased with myself.

My cats must have felt something different along the lines of, "Yum, my favorite treat!" As soon as I left the room, I heard a funny munching noise then the sound of cats scampering across the floor with such enthusiasm that they were losing traction. At first glance, the tulips looked okay, but when I looked more carefully, one stem had been decapitated. Under the table were a few small petals and some pollen (and some other stuff not related to this, but let's not go there).

After dinner, I moved the tulips to the living room where we were watching TV. As we were getting ready for bed, I heard the telltale sound again. The cats scattered when I entered the room, and the munching sound resumed from behind the sofa.

I locked the tulips in the pantry over night, and the next day put them on my desk while I was working. I took a break to shovel snow (the stairwell down to the basement was literally full, and I needed to do laundry), and when I came back, there were tulip "guts" on my desk.

I now have 7 tulips safely stashed in the pantry where nobody can enjoy them.

(More on Florida soon. I'm working on my pictures from the Everglades now.)

Florida, day 8: shopping day

We started the day with breakfast together with our new friends, the general-manager of the hotel and his family. It was a shame we didn't have more time to get to know them better, and the kids really did play well together. It was especially fun to watch our daughter and their son on their "dates."

Since my husband's conference was over, we'd originally planned to leave Miami today, but we couldn't find anywhere to stay in the Everglades where we wanted to go. We would have to drive back to Miami or equally far on to Naples, so we stayed in Miami. We were considering changing to a cheaper hotel, but our new friends offered us a "comp." The mom thought that as a photographer, I'd appreciate a room with a better view. Being the perpetual bargain hunter, it doesn't get any better than a free night's stay in a nice hotel, so I was thrilled. We were to pack up our stuff and leave it in our room when we went out for the day. When we came back, our stuff would be in our new room.

There was another Harbor Freight Tools in the Miami area, and since the one we'd been to on Wednesday didn't have everything on my husband's list, we went there first. We foolishly trusted the car's GPS, so it took us a lot longer to get here than we'd expected. After that, we went to the Dolphin Outlet Mall in search of pants for my husband and shoes for my daughter (and me, but that was less urgent). My daughter found a good pair of shoes, but I never really got a chance for a proper look since the Sketchers outlet was crowded and a bit disorganized. We ate a late lunch at Johnny Rockets, a 50's style diner. That had been one of our favorite restaurants in San Diego, but they went out of business years ago, so this was a nice treat. I had a tuna melt and a chocolate malt. Yum! It was raining by the time we'd completed our pants mission, so we went back to the hotel.

Our new room was the Presidential Suite on the top (21st) floor, and it truly was sweet! The views of downtown and waterfront were incredible! The suite had a "normal" sized room as the bedroom, plus another room double that size with two sitting areas (one with a TV) and a dining area. Our previous room was nice, but this was really beautiful. I especially liked the bathroom. Let's just say, I could get used to this! I'm grateful we were given this opportunity, because it's probably something I never would have experienced otherwise.

Our daughter camped out on the king sized bed watching a "Wizards of Waverly Place" marathon on the Disney channel, and we watched "27 dresses" in the living room. We weren't hungry for dinner, so we just had a couple cookies instead.

Florida, day 7: Mother-Daughter day

On Friday, my daughter and I were on our own. I considered renting roller skates and exploring South Beach, but I decided to go to a nice beach instead. I'd read that Key Biscayne has one of the top 10 beaches in the world, so we went there. At first it seemed like all beach access was closed there too, but we eventually found a lot that was open. As luck would have it, it was the lot nearest the playground. The playground held her attention for only a few minutes, after which we went in search of the "seahorse thing that squirts water" which I had read about and the parking attendant mentioned. We found something that resembled the outdoor showers that one rinses off with at the beach, and it had seahorses instead of shower heads, but the water to it had been turned off. That was completely underwhelming, so we continued to the beach itself.

The beach was lined with palm trees and absolutely beautiful! There were a few people around, but it was far from crowded. Once again, I found the water a bit cold, but my daughter played in the waves for quite some time before settling down to build a sand castle. Birds were fishing in the water behind her, but the wind was increasing, and I felt my camera was safer in the backpack. Soon sand was building dunes on my towel, and I felt uncomfortably like I was being sandblasted. I was helping to finish the sand castle when it started pouring rain. Everyone took shelter under the lifeguard building and debated stay or go.

We decided to change into dry clothes and go. At the restrooms, a flock of large white birds (ibises?) brazenly strutted past us and raided the trashcan. By the time we were ready to go, it had stopped raining. On the way to the parking lot, we saw a pair of wild iguanas (probably close to 1 m long, including tail). Unlike alligators, I love iguanas and other lizards, so we watched them for quite a while.

We drove into town on Key Biscayne in search of lunch, but much to my surprise, we did not find any fast food. I eventually found a parking spot at a strip mall, and we walked around to examine the restaurants more closely. They all had cloth tablecloths and napkins--not exactly where you want to take a 7 year old for a quick lunch. We decided to buy sandwiches at the supermarket which we ate on a bench out front.

My daughter wanted to go swimming in warm water, so we went back to the pool at the hotel. I was happy to sit by the pool with my book. There were a couple of kids there, and they all hit it off immediately. The little boy seemed quite taken by my daughter. They played for a couple of hours, but with the sun low in the sky it was time to go. The boy asked for our room number so that he could send up milk and cookies. I must have had a funny expression, because his mother quickly explained that the general manager of the hotel was his father. The whole family was at the hotel because they were going to see Cavalia (like Cirque du Soleil but with horses) that evening. The boy then asked if Lina could join them for drinks in the lounge. We needed to shower (especially after the beach), but I'd never seen Lina get ready so quickly. We let Lina go with her new friends, then my husband and I joined them a little later.

They took Lina to see the "ghost mall" under the hotel. Apparently the downturn in the economy has hit Miami hard. Besides entirely deserted shopping centers, there were abandoned development projects, and entire buildings of empty condos and apartments. The luxury condos along the waterfront were 75% unoccupied. Many old buildings were torn down to make room for new ones that have not materialized leaving downtown speckled with empty lots.

We enjoyed drinks and interesting conversation with our new friends, and we made plans to meet for breakfast. Before leaving for their show, they recommended a Mexican restaurant, so we decided to give that a try.

We took the free MetroMover monorail to get there, which made for interesting people watching. One man wore a hat woven from palm fronds with an amazing grasshopper in the same material. Lina must have been staring at the grasshopper also because he suddenly gave it to her, and he gave me a similar rose. We have carried these treasures all the way back to Sweden, and they somehow didn't get too mashed.

We were told that Rosa Mexicano had the best guacamole ever, and that was true! I wasn't a huge guacamole fan until I tried this, and it was paired with the perfect light and crispy tortilla chips. I was tempted to cancel my dinner order and have more guacamole and chips instead, but I didn't, and I wasn't disappointed. The carne asada soft tacos were wonderful too. Lina was so exhausted that she fell asleep at the table having hardly eaten a thing. We took a taxi back to the hotel.

When we got back to our room, we were surprised to find a room-service cart with a plate of giant chocolate chip cookies, a pitcher of milk and a bottle of wine (on ice). I had totally forgotten. We were too stuffed to eat much at the time, but it was a lovely treat and the perfect end to a fantastic day.