Hong Kong: Day 5, Honoring the family

We started the day off in a panic by oversleeping. My mom was so sure she’d wake up early that she did not set the alarm clock. We must have been really tired since I was the first to awaken at 7:45 (45 minutes late)! Luckily, we were able to make up the time by eating breakfast in our room as we got ready (fruit, tea, and the emergency crisp bread I’d brought in case I really didn’t like a meal.) An hour later, my cousin picked us up and drove us to the family plot.

The graveyard was on the side of a mountain on the far side of Hong Kong island. Graves with a view are highly coveted, and this was one of the best locations with a magnificent ocean view. The family plots were about halfway up the mountain, which meant a lot of stairs. It was no problem for me, but it couldn’t have been easy for Uncle L or Aunt R (Aunt A did not come—it would have been impossible for her anyhow).

We started by sweeping the graves and arranging the flowers—various relatives getting different yet very specific combinations of flowers. On the top level, there was only the grave of my mom’s parents. Her father was buried where he died in China during WWII, but Uncle L made a tremendous effort and retrieved his bones and had him reburied with his wife in the 1980’s. At this grave, we lined up and bowed three times, then three more times on the behalf of all the relatives who were not there. Then we moved down a level to the grave of mom’s grandfather and uncles, and we repeated the bowing thing. Then we moved down yet another level to the graves of mom’s grandmother, grandfather’s first wife (the oldest grave in the bunch), and a few other relatives. Again, we repeated the bowing thing. It’s interesting that the graves are arranged that the highest grave has the highest place of honor, but the lower two levels are now full. Hopefully the ancestor’s ghosts are practical and will understand that whoever dies next and gets the remaining spots on the top level are not claiming the places out of disrespect or anything like that.

After the graveyard, my cousin had to get to work, so he dropped mom, Uncle L, and I off downtown. Mom had an appointment to take care of some visa related stuff, so that took a couple hours, then Uncle took us out to lunch at a wonderful buffet which served both western and Chinese dishes and a lovely selection of desserts. After lunch, he wanted to take us on the double-deck tram to the end of the line and back in both directions to see the city. He said this would take about 45 minutes, so off we went. He pointed out the history and a lot of interesting facts. At the end of the line, we spent a few minutes walking around an open air market that sold mostly food (very interesting, but not particularly appetizing to somebody who is used to seeing meat handled under sanitary conditions and wrapped in plastic. By the time we got back to our starting point in the middle 2 ½ hours later, we convinced him to skip the other direction. Then he wanted to show us his office. After that we had to hurry back to the hotel so that we could meet Aunt R for dinner.

Dinner was at an Austrian restaurant together with Uncle A from Las Vegas who just happened to be in town for the day. Again, it was another excellent meal. After dinner, mom took me to a shop where she had found a particularly good deal because she wanted me to get some black slacks. I found some for about $15, and I got a suit for $50 too.